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Did You Hear - Jokes

This is our collection of "Did you hear?" jokes.

This is page 1 of 5

There are 54 jokes in this category.

Did you hear about the woman who wanted to get married to a ghost?
I can't think what must have possessed her.

Did you hear about the stupid hitch-hiker?
He started his journey before dawn to avoid the traffic.

Did you hear about the famous Italian painter who always sat on a block of ice while he painted?
His name was Bottichilli.

Did you hear the story about the empty glass jar?
Well, there's absolutely nothing in it.

Did you hear about the man who was so stupid he thought a law suit was a policeman's uniform?

Did you hear that it takes ten sheep to make one sweater?
I didn't even know sheep could knit.

Did you hear about the train driver who decided to leave his job?
He's looking for something along the same lines.

Did you hear about that billboard at the side of the road?
It's owned by an old man called Lang. That's why they call it old Lang's sign.

Did you hear about the animal that told little white lies?
He was an amphibian.

Did you hear about the out of work super hero who took a job looking after books?
Conan the Librarian.

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A Randomly Selected Joke

Diner: Waiter there's a twig in my soup.
Waiter: Hold on sir, I'll call the branch manager.

You can find more like this in the Jokes About Restaurants & Food category