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Jokes About Car Drivers And Driving

This is our collection of jokes about car drivers and driving.

There are 12 jokes in this category.

What kind of car does an electrician drive?
A volts wagon.

What do cars do at the disco?
They brake dance.

What make of car do shepherds drive?
Lamb drovers.

Did you hear about the motorist who always drove his car in reverse?
He knew the town backwards.

What do you call a country where everyone drives pink cars?
A pink car nation.

Policeman: I stopped you because you were doing over fifty miles an hour.
Motorist: That's impossible, I've been driving for less than an hour.

A man in his 40's bought a new Mercedes and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive. The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to open her up.
As the needle jumped up to 90 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.
"There's no way they can catch a Merecedes," he thought to himself and opened her up further. The needle hit 100, 110.... Then the reality of the situation hit him. "What am I doing?" he thought and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car. "It's been a long day, this is the end of my shift and it's Friday the 13th. I don't feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go."
The guy thinks for a second and says, "Last week my wife ran off with a cop. I was afraid you were trying to give her back."
"Have a nice weekend," said the officer.

You totaled your car...
and can't remember why...
could it have been...
that case of Bud Dry?

He who hesitates is not only lost, but miles from the next exit.

Car Driver (telephoning after he has had an accident) - Send help at once, I've turned turtle.
Mechanic: This is a garage not a pet shop.

A Randomly Selected Joke

I have a very responsible job.
In the office where I work, whenever a mistake is made, my boss tells his boss that I'm responsible for it.

You can find more like this in the Office Humor category