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Jokes About Restaurants And Food

Waiters, food and restaurants have always been a good source of jokes and humor. This is page 1 of 3

There are 34 jokes in this category.

Customer: How long have you been working in this restaurant?
Waiter: Two weeks, sir.
Customer: Only two weeks. Well it can't have been you that took my order.

Waiter: I can recommend the wood pigeon, sir.
Customer: Really? What flavor is the wood?

Waiter, waiter, is there soup on the menu?
No, Sir, I've just wiped it off.

My sister was going to marry a waiter, but he had reservations.

Why was there screams coming from the kitchen?
The chef was beating the eggs.

Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Those flys just don't care what they eat do they.

Waiter, waiter, what's that fly doing in my ice-cream?
Learning to ski, sir.

Waiter, there's a piece of soap in my soup.
That's to wash it down with sir.

I've made the chicken soup.
That's a relief, I thought it was for us.

Waiter, waiter! There's a slug in my salad
I'm very sorry sir, I didn't know that you were a vegetarian.

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A Randomly Selected Joke

The Crist family worked at a zoo. Each year they predicted the general luck and overall mood of the year by watching the the gnu. If the gnu's ears were forward, that meant a successful, joyous year was almost certain to happen. But if his ears were laid back flat against his head, it meant that an unlucky or very unhappy year was sure to come. One year it was young Mary's turn to "survey" the animal and come up with the prediction. It was her first time solo, and in her excitement, she forgot to take the key to the cage. She was late in coming to check on the gnu. Well, she saw the wrong ear position and predicted a bad year, when in fact it was quite good.
To explain the error, the local newspaper ran the following headline a year later: MARY CRIST MISSES AN HAPPY GNU'S EAR!

You can find more like this in the Christmas category